By the time this posts, I will be in surgery. My family, Kate and her parents are all sitting in the waiting room.
I am a guy so talking about my feelings isn’t necessarily my
best skill, and I’m sure Kate would tell you that I stink at it. Donating an organ is not something you can
really ever prepare yourself for. I can’t
really think of any other circumstances that really compares that you do on a
regular basis that you can say, you know what it will probably be just like
that. So it is all new territory. Especially
for someone who has spent very little time in the hospital.
It does however give you a new perspective on what people
have to go through, and makes you appreciate your health a lot more.
The other thing you never really prepare for in this
situation is how hard this is on your family.
I guess you kind of get caught up in the fact that you are doing a good
thing, and it is stressful on you. But for your family human nature takes over
and you just tend to think the worst.
Even though there is a less than 1 percent chance I will die, that is
immediately what you think of when you think something might go wrong. You don’t consider that they might open me up
and decide it is too risky and stop the surgery, or that they take the kidney
and it doesn’t take for Ashley. You
think one of two things, this will go well, or I won’t make it out of it, not
sure how the human mind works that way, but it makes it very difficult.
I guess the reason I am writing this I need my family to
know that I didn’t go into this thinking what can I do to make their life’s
harder. Also they need to know that I couldn’t
have gone through this process without their support, it wouldn’t have been
possible. I can only hope that this
process while difficult can help to bring our family closer together (not that
it wasn’t close before) but to give us a perspective of how important we are to
each other (this also wasn’t anything I thought about when deciding to do this,
but the day before it seems a lesson I have begun to learn).
I want to take this Blog to thank my Mom and Dad for always
being supportive in whatever crazy decisions I have made throughout my life,
and I know there has been more than the average kids share. I am thankful for how they raised me, and the
man they have helped me become. There
are so many memories that it just doesn’t seem like this is the forum to go
through them all so I won’t but I just wanted to say thank you. I am also thankful for my brother and the
support he has given me through this, and for me having a little brother has
always made me strive to be a better example for him (even though I have failed
a lot) and made me realize there are a lot of times when he can be the example I
need to follow.
I also want to thank the Merrell family for all their
support I know you hear a lot of jokes about in-laws but I feel pretty lucky
about mine.
Last but not Least thanks to all of our friends and all the
prayers and support you have thrown our way, they have been felt, and God has
answered so many prayers that I can’t even begin to explain or tell you
about. There is no way I could have
gotten through this without all of you.
For those of you that I don’t know but have been following
the blog and all of Ashley’s friends I look forward to meeting you, hopefully
we will have a meet and greet after the surgery, and I just hope that in some
way this story has meant something to you, I know it is about so much more than
Ashley and me and Kate. It is such a big
story, and is very humbling to be a part of it.
Remember to keep track of the blog Kate will be updating the
details.
No comments:
Post a Comment